• I'm such a fool
    For loving someone who loves another
    They don't see it
    But I do
    I see it every time there near each other
    I see how much they want to be togeather
    And yet they arn't for the sake of me
    Yet I don't see why
    I'm no longer with the one I love
    We're apart because of her
    He still denies to me
    That his heart is now hers
    He won't admit it
    Even to himself
    She holds his heart more then I ever did
    I think I should just return home
    And let them have the love they want
    I'm just a burden to him
    That's what I have been to him from the start
    I can't do anything right for him
    I never could
    We always fought
    Always hurt one another
    I should just go home
    And leave him to be happy
    Even though he says he wants me to stay
    I know in the look in his eyes when he sees her
    He's rather be by her side
    At every chance he could have
    She's even better for him
    They never fight
    They love every second that there around each other
    To her I'm just an obstical to get rid of
    She hates the vary fact that I'm near him
    She'd love to know I'm gone
    She wants him so badly
    Even willing to forsake her family
    For a love with him
    I say they should just go ahead and be togeather
    It's what they both want
    Why don't they just stop fighting it
    And give in to it all
    I think as soon as the things he needs are gotten
    And I have the money to go home and live on I'll leave
    I'll give them there peace
    To be togeather
    To be happy
    To have the chance
    That I never had with him
    For these last two years
    We've been lieing to our selves
    About this working
    And being togeather forever
    More so for one then the other
    But that one name won't be said
    Why hold on to something
    That you haven't had in a long time
    I lost any chance I had of working things out with him
    To that one other
    The one who now holds his heart
    Closer then I ever could
    Sure I morn the loss
    But that's all I can do
    I have nothing left with him
    I haven't for a while now
    I give up every clam I had on him
    Be it lover or friend
    I can't calm to have any of those with him anymore
    There not for me anymore
    I lost that when I let it go this far
    She holds all for those now
    And even more then I could have ever dreamed for
    If ever I cry over him again
    I shall hide it
    He'll never know how much I kills me
    Kills me for him to love her
    To have lost him to her
    To have given him up in a fit of rage
    Though I think it's better that it was done that way
    Instead of me finding out at a later date that he no longer
    Wanted to be by my side
    I know he says he still loves me
    But if it were true
    I would have had another chance with him
    Or if not that I wouldn't have lost him to begin with
    So I know the truth
    He loves her and no me
    He always wants to make her happy
    No matter what it costs another
    Thats true love
    Not what we had
    If he were ever to read this
    It may piss him off
    Or hurt him
    But the truth is
    He loves her
    He always thinks of her
    The only times he thinks of me is to worry
    And nothing more
    He has no love left for me
    And I'm fine with that
    Perfectly fine with it
    So because of that
    I'll return home once he has everything he needs
    So that he can be happy with the one he loves
    Not in pain for the one he doesn't
    Life is a painful thing to live through
    But that's something we learn
    As we live it
    Life will always kick you when your down
    Well I've been down for a long time
    And I keep getting hurt by those I thought loved me
    As I have loved them
    I guess I should give up on love
    I think I may just do that
    Maybe then I'll save myself some pain
    If not being in love
    Will save me the heartbreak
    I have felt for these past few years
    Then fine
    I'm sick of being crushed
    I'm sick of being used
    Being lied to
    And being told that they love me
    When they really love another
    Well I hope they have gotten there fill of hurting me
    For I'm done
    I'm not dating anymore
    And I'm not falling for another
    Nor will I act on any feelings of love
    I have had for anyone in the past
    I'm only a friend from now on
    And a friend I shall stay
    Only a friend
    No benifits either
    No love
    No pleasure
    Just a friend to be there to help you
    Hmmm that's how I was to start with
    And that's how I shall end my life
    A friend
    Never a lover
    Nor a mother
    Like I wanted to be
    How sad
    But oh well
    That's my life
    One I shall live through
    To prove even the broken
    Can still move on.
    ~DL~