So, I'm back with this series... It's been a few weeks, hasn't it? Well, I wish I could say that my absence was caused by something as forgiveable as personal problems, or life issues, but really, I just lost interest. But now, for better or worse, I'm back with part 3, so let's kick this off right!
#20 Worst: Strawberry Panic
Can an anime make this list just by having the worst looking animation i’ve ever seen? No? That’s okay, I have other reasons for putting this mildly popular yuri title on here.
Strawberry Panic takes place not only at an all girls high school, but apparently in an all girls universe, where there are no men, everyone is a lesbian, and nobody ever questions this... They just pine for each other, separated only by social status and pointlessly angsty melodrama. Basically, it’s a universe that exists only in the minds of the basement-dwelling man-children who wish they could observe it from just that safe of a distance.
To be fair, the main couple in this series is actually a really well written and developed one. The other couples, however, constantly alternate between being painful, unengaging, and just flat-out boring, but the story needs filler, and fill it they do, while never making any impact on the plot.
It’s a decent plot, but very, very poorly executed. And animated.
#20 Best: Welcome to the NHK
The main character in this show is a bitter, lonely shut-in who somehow manages to be both arrogant and self-loathing at the same time. Refusing to blame his problems on himself, he instead focuses on the imaginary social conspiracy of a group called The NHK. By all means, there shouldn’t be a single shred of likeability in him... What makes him so compelling is how this slice-of-life show’s brilliant writing and consistently dark sense of humor paint his relationship with the equally damaged people who mysteriously gravitate towards him. He forms three important relationships in all, and each one develops at a perfect pace while delivering sick twists and startling revelations, regardless of whether or not he’s imagining them.
It’s a fascinating show... If only the animation was better.
#19 Worst: Tenjou Tenge
I’ll be honest, this show didn’t have to make the list. The story is fine, and the action scenes are actually pretty damn strong. It could have taken it’s bizarre yakuza-esque student council plot, clunky character designs and inconsistent animation and just barely skated it’s way to the dishonorable mentions list, if it wasn’t for the two glaring flaws that it simply can’t be forgiven for.
First of all, it tries to feed us six consecutive episodes of a flashback paced haphazardly towards the end of the series. We already know how that flashback will end before we even watch it, making the lengthy journey sort of pointless. And if that’s not bad enough, once that flashback ends, we finally start to build up to what promises to be an awesome climactic ending, which just... Abruptly ends. Yeah, we were supposed to have some kind of fighting tournament, right? We make it to just before the fight’s about to take place, and the story just ends. Not cool, Tenjou. Not cool.
#19 Best: Bamboo Blade
Just because Azumanga Daioh revolutionized the High School Girls version of the slice-of-life melodrama, that didn’t mean it would be the one to perfect it. Bamboo Blade did this, by creating a slew of loveable characters, and adding a heaping helping of sports passion to the story.
While the animation is nice, and the kendo plot is very well executed, the true selling point of this show is it’s cast of characters, and their slowly developing friendships. But it’s the main character, Tamaki, who you’ll have the most fun following. While she’s already a master of the sport, it’s her outlook towards it and her colleagues that still has to develop throughout. Any sports show where the would-be Mary Sue has to learn what it’s like to lose is a winner in my book.
It’s touching or even poignant when it wants to be, hilarious whenever it tries to be, and uses it’s slow pace to every possible advantage.
#18 Worst: Ookami-san and Seven Companions
Yes, I know, this is a very popular show. I don’t know why, since the writing is so terrible, but hey, any show where the main character wears cat-boxing gloves is going to attract viewers to it anyway.
I’ve already talked at length about this show in a semi-review from last year, so I won’t waste too much time talking about how sleazy and disgusting it’s approach at characterization can be, and instead say something about it that I haven’t before.
This anime is terrified of itself. To an astounding degree. It won’t resolve the fairy tale subplot, because it’s afraid of being too ridiculous. It uses an annoying narrator to MST and ultimately drown out the dialogue, because it’s afraid that it’s own poor writing won’t be able to stand up without the help. It’s afraid to clarify what happened to Ryoko in the past, because it doesn’t want to upset or offend the viewers. It won’t show our heroes collecting indebted favors from anybody, because it’s afraid of making them look unlikeable.
This show, as it’s set up, had boat loads of potential, yet failed to live up to any of it.
#18 Best: Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni
And here we are, at what may be the best horror anime series ever created. It didn’t create the term Yandere, but it damn well owns it, juxtaposing cutesy moe slice-of-life comedy with some of the most deliciously twisted horror themes you’ll ever find. Rather than using cheap jump scares or comfortable tropes, it relies on a mastery of sound effects, camera angles, and perfect dramatic timing, building up the tension slowly, reveling in the taste of it’s own suspense before blasting you with the bone-chilling climaxes. Then it starts all over again, telling it’s story over and over again in different timelines, a technique that has been tried by several other anime since, with nearly all of them failing miserably at it. *cough*Amnesia*cough*
Yes, the dub is bad, and this is coming from a guy who’s very forgiving of dubs, but the original Japanese sub is beyond outstanding, particularly with the characters’ laughs. Yes, the second season was a disappointment, but since the names are different, we’re only focusing on season 1, and judged on it’s own, Higurashi... AKA When They Cry... Is a genuinely scary, engaging horror mystery that more than deserves this spot.
#17 Worst: Gantz
Remember what I said about Okami being disgusting and sleazy with it’s characterizations? Yeah, that goes double for Gantz, a cult hit among gore and sci-fi fans. I can take extensive gore and nudity... Remember, I liked Elfen Lied quite a bit... But when the subject of suicide quickly devolves into fan-service, attempted rape and dog-related cheesecake, it almost makes me want to forgive Okami-san for it’s clumsy dance-around of equally serious subject matter.
It doesn’t help that the main character, Kei Kurono, is every bit as unlikeable as NHK’s lead could have been, only so much worse. He develops into a much better character in the final story arc, but that’s just not enough to justify putting up with him that long in the first place. Even putting him aside, the entire cast blisteringly incompetent in a way that would make the Blood C girl blush.
On top of that, the animation is embarrassingly bad, and the ending won’t satisfy even the most forgiving of viewers.
#17 Best: Kino’s Journey
It’s difficult to describe this show without sounding pretentious... After all, what show hasn’t been called deep and philosophical by somebody? Hell, when I was a lot younger, I used to say exactly that about another anime situated at #15 on the worst list.
But that’s exactly what Kino’s journey is... A deep and philosophical show that manages to avoid pretense by exploring it’s philosophies quietly, rather than being blunt or preachy about them. As our androgynous hero and her talking motorcycle visit country after country, not staying at abny of them for more than three days, they absorb and observe the cultures of each country, rarely ever interfering with or influencing those cultures. Since these countries act as parables for the many faces of humanity, overing good, evil and in-between, it’s a mature, thought provoking show that will leave an unforgettable impression on you, despite it’s complete lack of fan-service and precious few action scenes.
The animation is decent, but like the show itself, lacking in ambition. The main characters play off of each other exceedingly well, and yet neither receives any significant development. Those are the only two flaws keeping it from moving higher on the list, but with story-telling this profound, it’s still well worth checking out.
#16 Worst: Heroic Age
One of the reasons that I wanted to get back into this list after such a long absence was my intense desire to rip into this idiotic hunk of space debris. Heroic Age is, by far, the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen, and this is coming from a former Tom Green fan. It doesn’t just break the sci-fi rules you’re allowed to break... Like wings and sound explosions working in space... But it doesn’t even seem to grasp the most basic concepts of every day life. On the one hand, you have the main character... A complete rip-off of Goku, but that’s another rant for another time... Digging a hole through the side of the ship without causing an air breach. Even Jason X, the dumbest movie in a franchise about a moral-driven mongoloid corpse, knows what suction is. On the other hand, you have three characters showering together in their clothes to wash massive paint stains off of said clothes. Because that's how paint... And showers... Work.
Leaving this show’s intense stupidity behind us, the CG animation, may look pretty damn good, but the majority of the screen time goes to the 2D animation, which is cheap looking at best. There are way too many characters, and way too few back stories to go along with them, and the plot behind this show is way too complicated for it’s own good.
I don’t even hate this show for being as bad as it is... It’d be unfair, like hating a toddler for not knowing how to drive.
#16 Best: Mushishi
Much like Kino’s journey, this is a show about a character who travels from parable to parable, exploring the many dimensions of humanity. Unlike Kino’s Journey, Mushishi is twice as long, carries twice the ambition, and also has twice the character development. It’s not only one of the most original series I’ve ever seen, but it’s also one of the most imaginative and creative, while still following a single idea the entire time.
It’s beautiful, it’s immersive, it’s entirely eastern in it’s presentation and influences, and the artwork... Particularly in regards to the background and atmospheric art... Is a wonder on it’s own, and you couldn’t really be blamed for pausing multiple times per episode just to get lost in it.
The story centers around Mushi, mysterious supernatural life forms. The Mushi themselves are very human in their diversity, coming in all shapes and sizes, with a variety of intentions and lessons to be learned, each with it’s own impact on the world around it that our hero has to understand in order to resolve.
It is, quite frankly, beautiful.
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