201 ΡδρζαΓ

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Sɑɱυεƪ ᴊᴏᵴҥʋᴀ Ɖɑᴠіʂ
“Relationships are ropes. Love is a noose."

While to Micha it probably seemed like Samuel was taking this all very lightly, the truth of the matter was that he was being quite serious. He knew the risks of what his actions could mean for them. He knew how important status was to his family. If someone outside were catch wind of his sexuality it could very well be the end to a multimillion dollar industry that had been going strong for nearly six generations. It was indeed a very scary thought, but he didn't want to hide anymore. When he threw Micha out of his house last month to hide him from his brothers last month he felt awful. It was in that moment that he had realized what was really important. He hadn't kicked Micha out to protect himself. He did it to protect Micha. He'd seen firsthand what could happen to people who rubbed his family the wrong way. Unlike them, Samuel knew Micha, he knw what sort of personality and how hard it could be to understand him properly. In his moment of weakness he chose family over love and hurt the person he cared for most in the process. He didn't want to have to make a decision like that ever again. If he did he knew exactly who would end up hurt this time and it wasn't going to be pretty in the long run.

He waited for Micha to continue messing with his hair before speaking. Again there was a slight pause that made him watch the male curiously. Samuel arched an eyebrow as Micha began shifting behind him. He watched the male curiously, a bit fearful he might hurt himself. When he stood from the couch, Samuel found himself automatically reaching out toward the male and slipping his arms loosely around his waist when he settled in front of him. Still curious for the sudden need to be close, he let Micha get comfortable and listened to him speak. It was rather heartbreaking how soft his voice was and to know how just how much he was worried about him. Samuel looked downat the space between them with a sad,small smile spread across his lips. "Well if they take it the way I think they will, then worse case scenario I lose my family, my inheritance, the mansion, and a couple of cars. Bright side is the name on the deed to the club is mine, I manage two other small businesses that can help bring in some extra income, and since I've been mentally preparing for this since I was about sixteen I have about $25.6 million dollars in a savings account my family doesn't know about. It's nowhere near the amount of what my inheritance is, but it's better than nothing. It should certainly be enough to buy a new home, keep business afloat, and food in the pantry." he replied.

If Samuel were to be exiled it would certainly be a step down from his current lifestyle. But he would just have to live with it. Family may be important to him, but so Micha. He wasn't about to give up on him just so he could live up to their standards. He'd put too much into this relationship to just abandon it now. "It'll be fine." he lied, his voice cracking ever so slightly. "I don't need them, their money, or bigotry. Everything will be just fine so don't worry about me." Samuel kept his head ducked just a few minutes longer. He sniffed a few times but refused to let any tears that welled fall. Samuel could probably rant for hours about the unfairness of this situation. But a part of him wanted to continue hoping that things could turn out for the better. Maybe one or both his parents would be okay with it. Maybe his brothers wouldn't even care. Maybe it would be all for the best if he lost his family. It wasn't exactly to cling to toxic relationships. But if he were to put it that way some might question what it was that he was doing with Micha. After clearing his throat he raised his head to meet Micha's gaze. He gave him a small smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

"It wasn’t about money, it never was. He knew Samuel had money to keep himself afloat as well as his businesses, but it was the way he would be seen. Micha knew that Samuel prided himself on his status but still he wondered if Samuel would regret it. He didn’t want Samuel giving everything up for him unless he was absolutely sure. Micha loved Samuel but he had nothing to give up. All he had to give was himself with Samuel there was so much more. He feared the backlash if things between them crumbled due to Samuel coming out. Micha didn’t want Samuel giving up his world just for him.

He held onto Samuel as he sat there, his voice barely reaching his words. Micha felt Samuel’s arms slip around his waist. He relaxed against his touch. Micha couldn’t help his clingy behavior at the moment. Indeed he was like a cat, distant one minute clingy and all over you the next. He watched as Samuel seemed to look down as well at his words. Micha listened as Samuel spoke, it didn’t help his own feelings and words. It only made his thoughts worse.

As Samuel continued to speak, he listened on. His words only seemed to worry him more. Micha heard Samuel’s voice crack as he lied. He watched as Samuel ducked his head down after he spoke. Micha sat there watching him, he wished there was more he could do. He waited watching as Samuel finally looked at him. Micha slipped a hand up seeing Samuel’s small wounded smile. ”You’re a horrible liar.” He spoke slipping closer as he slipped his arms around Samuel’s neck hugging him. ”Take things slow and don’t rush into things…Let’s give it until you come back from Paris at least, okay?” Micha spoke wanting to at least make sure that this was what Samuel wanted."

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Sɑɱυεƪ ᴊᴏᵴҥʋᴀ Ɖɑᴠіʂ
“Relationships are ropes. Love is a noose."

Samuel couldn't say for certain if he would up regretting his decision. If things went as he thought they would, he wanted to think it would be all for the best to lose everything and everyone that he knew and loved. For years he'd been living in fear, trying his hardest to be a perfect son and brother. At this point it was exhausting to keep up the facade. He didn't want to give up his family, but he knew if they disapproved they would do all they could to keep him away from Micha. In his twenty-four years of life not once did he ever see his family show any sign of acceptance towards the LGBT community.

He didn't mind Micha's clingy behavior because right now he was feeling pretty clingy himself. He understood that Micha was worried for him and he appreciated his concern. Right now everything was just speculation. He didn't want him to worry much. After all, given current circumstances Micha had a lot on his plate at the moment as well. He didn't mean to shift the attention to him, but merely give him a heads-up for his future plans. As he looked up at Micha another wave of emotion washed over him. The amount of pain amd worry he'd given the male was almost too much to handle. Samuel swallowed hard as Micha called him out on his lie. He allowed Micha to shift closer and pull him into a hug. Squeezing his eyes he buried his face into Micha's shoulder. He had the urge to hug him just as tightly as Micha was hugging him but he worried he would hurt him in the process. So he held on to him just as he had before.

Listening to the male speak he knew he was right. He most certainly should not jump in to this. But he didn't think he had the patience to wait any longer either. He felt like the longer he stayed in the closet the longer they were bound to have his family bombarding on him again during one of their sleepovers. He didn't want to have to send Micha away again or risk his family finding out before he was perpared to come out. "I understand what you're saying but my trip to Paris isn't for another month and a half. What if something happens before then? You don't know my family, they know I'm dating someone. In my family you don't just get to date whoever you want. If they don't like you, that's it. I can't tell you how many girls I saw Oliver and Ben go through before settling down with someone our parents chose for them." Pulling back, Samuel let his head hang once more. He was quiet for a moment, his head abuzz with frantic thoughts. "If you think that waiting is best then I'll respect your decision. But if in some time between now and Paris it comes up in conversation I'm not going to lie. After all according to a certain someone it would seem that lying isn't my forte." Samuel at last cracked a real smile as he teased the male. Now was csrtainly not the time to be joking, but he needed something to lighten the mood. Not only that his throat was feeling so dry and tight that he felt he might breakdown otherwise. The last thing he wanted was for Micha to see him cry.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

"Micha didn’t want to make the choice for Samuel. If Samuel wanted to tell his family then it was his choice. He wasn’t going to tell him “No.” Micha was simply just making sure that this was what Samuel wanted. He wasn’t the one hiding what he was or who he was. Micha was going to stand by Samuel’s side no matter what. No one was going to push him away not even Samuel’s family. He held onto Samuel as he hugged him. Micha felt Samuel hold on to him, knowing that Samuel wouldn’t hug him out of fear of hurting him.

Asking Samuel to wait wasn’t the right answer it seemed. He had asked the wrong thing. Micha felt bad for asking something of Samuel. He listened as Samuel spoke understanding where he was coming from. Micha could only imagine what Samuel’s family thought of the people their children went out with. He felt Samuel pull back from him. Micha looked at him, shaking his head lightly as Samuel spoke. ”If you want to tell your family then tell them. I can’t hold you back from your choice. They will either accept you or they won’t. As for everything else, I’m not going anywhere.” He spoke nodding slightly. Micha kissed Samuel gently on the lips before pulling away. He moved to stand carefully not wanting to hurt himself. Micha pulled away from Samuel as he stood, he reached to grab his coffee cup as he walked away heading toward the kitchen area. He set his cup on the counter for now, before heading off toward his storage room to find clothes so they could go get breakfast."

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Sɑɱυεƪ ᴊᴏᵴҥʋᴀ Ɖɑᴠіʂ
“Relationships are ropes. Love is a noose."

It wasn't so much that he wanted Micha make the decision for him, but he most definitely wanted to get his input on the situation. Samuel knew that Micha wasn't going anywhere. They'd been through too much to see him giving up so easily now. Still, he knew it was foolish to act so rashly. They had other matters that needed taking care of. Matters that, in his opinion, were far more pressing than him destroying his life in one fell swoop. Samuel didn't mind Mocha's question. When he spoke he was simply telling him how it is. In his head he knew it was better to wait. But he was feeling antsy. If he did wait it was going to be a very long month. He didn't have to look up to know that Micha was silently judging him. He remained quiet while Micha had his last say before he was kissed. He kissed him back tenderly and released his hold on Micha's waist.

Samuel watched cautiously as Micha rose from his lap. His hands hovered helplessly around him as though he were just waiting for him to fall. When he was standing, he left his hands fall back to his side. As Micha wandered off into another part of the studio, Samuel remained seated on the floor. Leaning forward he grabbed his coffee mug from the table. He brought the mug to his lips and took a few long sips of bitter liquid. Samuel stared down at the floor lost in his own little world. "One month, huh?" it seemed like enough time to get his affairs in order. With luck he could stash away some more money, maybe get a storage unit or two and hide away his more prized possessions. He also thought about putting two of his favorite cars somewhere, maybe letting a friend hang on to them or something. Sighing heavily he shook the unwanted thoughts from his head. They had too much to do today, he didn't need to make it all about him.

Samuel drained the rest of his coffee and padded into the kitchen to rinse out his mug and left it on the counter incase he decided to have some more. Heading back out, Samuel went down the hall and back upstairs. It took him a minute to shuffle through the small space before finding his shirt buried beneath Micha's clothes from yesterday. He gave the shirt a sniff before deeming it clean enough to wear again. Turning the fabric in his hands, he then pulled the shirt over his head and headed back downstairs to find Micha. Following the path the male had taken out of the living room, he found him in what he could only be assumed to be some kind of storage room. He leaned against the frame, quietly waiting for Micha to finish dressing.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

"Micha wasn’t going to push him, nor was he going to talk about it anymore. He was finished talking about the issue. Either Samuel spoke to his parents or he didn’t. Micha would be there for him if he needed him, that’s all he could be. He didn’t need their approval, but he knew Samuel wanted it in his own way. Micha loved Samuel and this was a big step between them. He wanted to move in together; after all they were always together having two separate places wasn’t doing them any good. Micha knew though he would need to sell his house, and cancel his agreement on his studio but he wasn’t about to rush into anything not yet anyways.

As he walked into his studio, there were lines of clothes hung up on racks. Micha walked toward the left as he had everything organized on style, size, and gender. He looked through the clothes trying to figure out what he wanted to wear. After looking through a few things, he grabbed a gray knit sweater and black jeans. He finished sorting through what he wanted and started to get dressed. Micha heard Samuel in the door way. He glanced toward him as he finished getting dressed. Micha fished out a pair of socks from a dresser drawer then grabbed a pair of boots from a rack. He took a seat on a stool as he started to put his socks and boots on. Micha glanced toward Samuel, ”What do you want for breakfast?” He asked knowing it was early, but he was getting hungry and anything sounded good to him."

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Sɑɱυεƪ ᴊᴏᵴҥʋᴀ Ɖɑᴠіʂ
“Relationships are ropes. Love is a noose."

Whatever his decision may be Samuel knew it was best to think it over by himself for the time being. Mcha had said his piece and he wasn't sure if he would hear much more of his babbling. He wouldn't blame him. After all they had other things that needed to be attended to. He leaned in the doorway and patiently waited for Micha to finish dressing. As he waited his eyes roamed over the various clothes. He had to admit he was a littled fascinated by them all. Although through the months they'd been together he'd gotten a taste of what sort of clothes Micha liked he'd never really just bothered to go rummage through his closet. Though that was mostly due to their size difference. Even in this small variety Samuel was sure nothing in the bunch could fit him. Samuel saw Micha move in the corner of his eye and turned his attention back to him just as he spoke. He gave a light shrug. Other than his morning coffee Samuel hadn't put much thought in to what he wanted for breakfast. "I don't know. What's closest?" he said. To be honest Samuel could probably take just about anything right now. He didn't really care that it waw still early. It simply meant they'd have more daylight to try and get whatever needed to be done today.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

"When it came to the wardrobe within his storage room, Micha had a wide range of sizes. He had a lot of models coming in and out of his studio. Micha saw a different variety and had to keep up with them. He had a few selections though which were just for his style though it was a small section. Micha knew that when it came to his choice of cloth, Samuel and he differed on what style was. Where he was comfortable in jeans and a sweater, Samuel seemed more the suit type at times. He preferred not to wear something overly extravagant after all it would only get to messy especially in his studio, here or at home. Micha had a bad habit of wiping his paintbrush on his clothes when it came to working in his studio at home. He had destroyed many of his clothes doing that but it didn’t matter to him, his clothes suffered for his art and he didn’t mind. Micha glanced toward Samuel seeing him shrug at his words. He finished working on putting on his boots as he slipped off the stool. Micha started toward Samuel, ”Well there’s a diner down the street?” He asked curiously not sure what Samuel had in mind. Micha though could go for some French toast and perhaps some bacon with coffee."

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Sɑɱυεƪ ᴊᴏᵴҥʋᴀ Ɖɑᴠіʂ
“Relationships are ropes. Love is a noose."

While there was no denying that Samuel had quite an array of suits he did have interest in other clothing. On his days off he liked wearing jeans that were just baggy enough to hang from his hips. He preferred graphic t-shirts to plain ones. Bonus points if said shirt happened to feature a favorite pop culture reference such as Nintendo, Lord of the Rings, or Star Trek. T-shirt and jeans aside, Samuel had a special love for jackets and hoodies. Embarrassing as it was to admit he had an entire closet in one of the other bedrooms that was dedicated to outerwear. Samuel lived for fall weather and the ability to wear soft, colorful hoodies and stylish leather jackets. These were just some of the things Samuel loved. While his usual apparel liked to reflect one thing, it was all a sham. Samuel would sooner strut about naked than be forced to live in nothing but suits and other semi-formal wear every hour of his life.

Samuel waited patiently for Micha to finish dressing. He gave Micha's suggestion all of three seconds before agreeing with him. "Yeah, sure that'll work." he replied. Pushing away from the doorframe, Samuel headed back toward the living room. There he quickly pulled on his socks and stepped into his shoes. He waited for Micha to join him in at the door. Once he was ready to leave, Samuel stepped into the hallway. "I know you hate 'em but do you want to take the elevator down?" he asked. Samuel was unsure how much pain Micha might be in today, he hadn't asked. But if it helped he didn't mind taking an elevator instead of the stairs if it would makes things easier. Same for other small menial tasks he was sure to frustrate Micha in his time of healing.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

"After finishing getting dressed, Micha made a suggestion of going to the small dinner near his studio. He knew it would be open this early in the morning, after all most of the clubs around would have closed hours ago. Micha nodded as Samuel agreed with his suggestion. He made his way out of his storage room as Samuel moved away from the door frame. Micha walked toward his desk as he grabbed his keys, wallet and phone. He slipped his wallet and phone into his pocket while he waited for Samuel to put his shoes and socks on. Seeing that Samuel was finished, he joined him at the door. Micha opened the door letting Samuel out first. He pulled the door closed locking it. Micha glanced toward Samuel as he spoke mentioning easy transportation down via the elevator. He glanced toward it knowing it was easier than taking the flight of stairs down. Micha sighed but nodded. ”Yeah, that’s fine.” He spoke stepping away from the door after locking it. Micha made his way toward the elevator as he pushed the button on the side panel waiting for the elevator to rise to their level. Once it reached them, he stepped on lightly feeling the slight bounce at his shift of weight. He was glad for modern technology, that his studio didn’t have one of those really old elevators which had only a gate for protection and was made of wood. Micha pressed the button on the panel for the lobby as he moved to let Samuel inside as well. "

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Sɑɱυεƪ ᴊᴏᵴҥʋᴀ Ɖɑᴠіʂ
“Relationships are ropes. Love is a noose."

He nodded quietly aw Micha agreed. He knew how much they both disliked the metal box of death, but he thought he might prefer that compared to limping down the stairs. Once the door was locked, he followed Micha over to the elevator, watching as he pressed the necessary button and waiting beside him for the elevator. When it came about a minute later Samuel allowed Micha to get on first before stepping on as well. The elevtor gave a little jostle but soon stilled as he placed himself beside Micha. He watched the doors close and leaned back against the wooden railing. The rie was swift and less bumpy than he last remembered. When the doors opened, he stepped out and waited for Micha. They walked together across the lobby and out the front door. Although the diner wasn't too far from Micha's studio he still led the way over to his car. He was sure that after they ate their fill, Micha would want to grab what he could from his house and see about getting his father off his back.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

"As the doors closed after Samuel got onto the elevator, Micha stood next to the wall. He held onto the railing provided in the elevator though it did little use to comfort him. Micha stood there staring at the ground waiting for the elevator doors to once open again. He breathed a sigh of relief once they did. Micha released the railing as he stepped slow but swiftly out of the elevator. He walked with Samuel across the lobby and outside to his car. Micha knew walking wasn’t the likely option right at the moment. He stood waiting by Samuel’s passenger side door while Samuel went around to the other side. Once the car was opened, Micha opened the door and slipped inside carefully. His ribs screamed in objection to the awkward sitting of being in the car. He groaned softly to himself as he shut the door. Micha reached down as he adjusted the seat hoping to relieve some discomfort. He relaxed once the chair was leaning back about half way. Micha grabbed the seat belt and buckled himself in. He lay there staring at the ceiling of Samuel’s car while he waited for Samuel to start the car."

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Sɑɱυεƪ ᴊᴏᵴҥʋᴀ Ɖɑᴠіʂ
“Relationships are ropes. Love is a noose."

The walk to his car was slow and quiet. Samuel was tempted to other Micha an arm to lean on but was quite sure that it would be declined. When they reached his car, he hit the disarm button on his keys and walked around to the drivers side. Firmly placed under his windshield wiper was a shiny, new traffic ticket for not feeding the meter after it expired. Samuel let out a small groan. He knew he'd forgotten something. Folding the slip of paper, he stuffed it into his back pocket and priceeded to slip into the driver's seat. Samuel placed his key into the ignition and started to buckle up when he glanced toward Micha. He heard his light groan and tuned in his seat to reach into the middle console. He shuffled a few things around before pulling out a bottle of Naproxen Sodium. "When we get to the diner take two of these. It should help with the pain." he said softly, handing him the bottle. Samuel then finished buckeling his seat belt and started the car. Morning DJ's blabbered on about something news related before Samuel turned down the radio. Looking around them the streets were nearly deserted with just a few cars passing by. He pulled away from the curb once everything was clear and started down the street. They paused briefly at one red light where there were no cars. And again at the next light. Samuel was careful to avoid any pot holes and any other bumps in the road. After passing through another light, Samuel turned into the parking lot of the diner Micha mentioned. It was one of the ones he remembered they frequented when they first started seeing one another.

Cutting the engine, Samuel unbuckled his belt and came around the car to open the door and offer a hand to Micha. He wondered how much more of this his body could stand. Other than breakfast fhey hadn't really made any plans that were set in stone. He wondered if just for today would he prefer to postpone them? Shaking his head quietly he thought it best just to ask once they were seated.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

"As he sat there, he glanced toward Samuel. Micha couldn’t help the groan that escaped his lips. It was unavoidable, if he could have kept it in he would but he had a low tolerance for pain. He watched as Samuel reached into the middle console and pulled out a bottle of Aleve. Micha wasn’t surprised Samuel had heard his groan and was offering him something to take. He took the bottle and muttered thanks. Micha held onto the bottle while Samuel worked on starting the car. He relaxed while Samuel drove to the diner, taking the drive slow.

It didn’t take long to get to the dinner. As Samuel pulled up, Micha watched as quickly cut the engine and got out. He moved to unbuckle his seatbelt just as Samuel opened his door. Micha shifted getting out, but not without pain. He held it in this time as he took Samuel’s hand. Micha shut the door lightly behind him. He walked with Samuel toward the door, grabbing it; he opened the door and headed inside with Samuel. Micha glanced around seeing that there was a seat open by a window. He made his way toward the booth, taking a seat as he released Samuel’s hand. Micha grabbed the menu’s at the end of the table passing one toward Samuel, then started to look over his own."

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Sɑɱυεƪ ᴊᴏᵴҥʋᴀ Ɖɑᴠіʂ
“Relationships are ropes. Love is a noose."

As they walked into the establishment it was fairly empty. He looked around for a moment, then back at Micha. When the male seemed to make his decision on where to sit Samuel followed like a lost puppy. Although he was still feeling clingy he resisted his urges and sat opposite him in the booth. He smiled as he was given a menu, folding it open, and glancing down the list. Despite not being all that hungry he knew he had to eat. He'd be useless today otherwise. Sameuel looked through the list promising delicious omelets, fluffy pancakes, and warm buttery biscuits. He looked through the menu twice before making a decision and setting it aside. Samuel leaned back against the old leather, quiet for a moment while Micha looked at his own menu. Reaching into his back pocket he pulled out his pack of cigarettes and lighter. He then reached forward to pull the ashtray towards the center of the table. Slipping the cigarette between his lips Samuel left the pack on the table between them. After lighting the tip, he inhaled, holding his breath a moment before releasing it. "So what's the plan after here?" he asked casually. Samuel knew to a point what needed to be done. But in what order was beyond him. He liked to think that he would want to pay his father off first just to get him out of his hair. But then again maybe it would be better to get his belongings so he could decide where he wanted to stay before things settled down.