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~*Please tell me what i should improve or opinions on what could make this story better...Thank you*~


-Sunny Saulations-
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1/1/3 (Chapter 3)
Chapter 3- The 4 Secret Clans.

“Marichuyo what are doing here and how did you get here?” I said walking towards him.
He turned away from facing me and started walking towards the wall. “Wait Marichuyo! Don’t leave!” I ran towards him and grabbed his arm. He looked over his shoulder at me and closed his eyes. “Marichuyo if you have a secret cause now is the time to tell me because I have already seen what you can do.” I said frowning. He sighed and said “It’s a very long story if you want to take your time listening.” He pushed his glasses up a little…apparently they kept falling down. “I will never tell anybody about what you tell me Marichuyo.” I said letting go of his arm. He smiled and said “Let’s go to your house. I got to tell your brother something too.” He walked out of the janitor’s closet with a grin on his face. Was my brother in this too? I really wondered what was going on. I looked around on the floor of the janitor’s closets for my house key which was knocked out of my bag when Shikuyion slammed me against the wall. I finally found it after a few minutes of searching the dark floor. I grabbed it as quickly as I could and ran out of the janitor’s closet leaving behind the probably dead body of Shikuyion. I raced home with my heart pounding the entire way. I jumped over logs, trash cans, buckets leftover from painting the new Hotel that was just built six months ago, but why had they still been there if the building was finished? This town was very odd for just a small place to live. I finally made it to my house, I opened the door and was greeted by my mother whose hands were on her hips. “ I thought you went to Jamie’s house after school Kairoyo…why didn’t you come home sooner? I was so worried that you had been kidnapped, and I was just about to call the police too.” She said frowning then hugging me tightly. Jamie was an exchange student from America and why she came all the way to Mishikauyio Town…I have no idea at all, but we had became friends five years ago making it sort of easier to understand her culture, which I learned a lot from my mother who is an American herself She came to Mishikauyio Town and met dad and married him. But she had already knew how to speak Japanese, Portuguese, and English. That’s probably why we have the biggest house on our block because of moms job as a big hairstylist for many different people across the world. “ Mrs. Miesake iam sorry that I didn’t tell you that I was tutoring Kairoyo with her math and english work.” Marichuyo said walking into the family room. “Oh well its ok Marichuyo. You’re a very nice young man. You should go out with him Kairoyo…you guys would make the cutest couple.” My mother said smiling. I blushed redder than her apron. Marichuyo laughed and so did my brother Samutoyo. “Mom!” I yelled putting my arms by my side. Marichuyo signaled at me to go the kitchen. I hugged mom one last time and walked towards the kitchen with Marichuyo at my heels. Marichuyo quietly closed the kitchen door. “Ok Kairoyo you want to what’s going on?” he said putting his arms around his chest. “Yes. Please tell me I am very confused Marichuyo.” I said with eyes of concern. “Fine. There are 4 clans here in Mishikauyio Town, the Vampires, the Zombies, the Werewolves, and the Dark Elves. The zombies and the dark elves hate each other but hardly any dark elves remain today because of what the zombies did to them.” He said walking towards the window. “What did the zombies do?” I said looking at Marichuyo. “They ate their brains of course. But they spared some the dark elves so they could reproduce more of their species and have a war with them again.” He said laughing afterwards. “Those zombies seem like idiots.” I said looking down. “Basically they are Kairoyo. And the werewolves and the vampires still hate each other to this day. Many vampires live in secret, many live among us still fighting to protect the humans daily life everyday.” He said going behind me. “and the werewolves?” I said with a concerned look on my face. “They want to destroy every species on earth to prove their dominance to us. I Marichuyo Hisake am a vampire and swear to protect every species on earth. As well as your brother Samutoyo.” He said putting his hands on my shoulders. I turned around to face Marichuyo who just smiled at me showing his sparkly vampire teeth.

i guess iam a sucker for making my friends happy so i guess my rule about five comments is over. just please comment! =)





User Comments: [1]
1Yin8
Community Member





Thu Nov 06, 2008 @ 06:26pm


i like it... but it was kinda confusing at first.... i was wondering what Marichuyo did to get a reaction form her like that... so i had to reread... but other then that its just as great as the last 2!


User Comments: [1]
 
 
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