Since I got yelled at for putting "images" of myself onto the internetz, cause I am conceited and an idiot, causing my mom to scream at me, my depression to grow, and self hate to burst within myself, I walked to the park. Meh, I know, conceited whore. You don't have to remind me.
It was fairly windy when I arrived there, and I sat down on this bench far away from the little kids who were playing inside the actual park. The bench was on a hill-like surface, below it- fine cut grass. I sat on the bench's seat, and I wrote some poetry.
Then all of a sudden, I felt this god-like presence nearing me. The wind. It was the wind. I talk to myself all the time--- but this time I was talking to God. Well, that's what I felt. I told God to bring on the wind, and he did, the wind was so powerful it sorta felt like a gentle smack in the face. It felt good. I could have never imagined to be so close to God. It's been my dream forever.
I have had no prior experiences of talking to or with God, but I can tell you that it has been one of the most magnificent feelings I have had in months. This was really the highlight of my day, and it brought me to tears.
I have never felt this close to god in my whole life--- I just knew he existed, to me. I never knew it could happen. I couldn't be any happier for this single day, I mean, it was so unbelievable.
Me at the park today, after all those tears that had been shed:
Clintorus Eastwood Community Member |
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