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I felt like making a list:
The Ring: Yes, this little girl comes out of your television and...GOD, DID YOU SEE HER AT THE MTV MUSIC AWARDS. SHE WAS LIKE HYPERVENALATING AND STUFF. SUCH AN ANNOYING KID. Oh yeah, and the movie is just lame, but most of you have already seen it and have your opinions.
LOTR: Whatever the ******** that 3rd was was called -- Well, sitting next to some girl picking her nose while your friends crack jokes about you hitting on her isn't fun. Not only was the movie terrible, but I had to sit next to a booger-picker for 4 hours. I mean come on. gonk
The Matrix 2-3: "Hi, I'm Keanu Reeves and I suck at acting." The first movie was good, as was the first LOTR. Both LOTR and Matrix should've stopped at the first, but they didn't. Idiots.
The Grudge: It's a ripoff of The Ring, except this time the evil monsters are little kids that meow (wtf?), a girl missing a jaw, and a 30 year old The Ring girl who lives in a bathtub. Oh yeah, Buffy is in it too. Again, I had another terrible experience at the theaters watching yet ANOTHER sucky movie. No booger flinger this time, however. This time it was a sissy 13 year old girl that wouldnt STOP ******** SCREAMING. My ears rang when I left. Bad times.
Halloween 1 - wherevertheystopped: NO, MICHAEL MYERS IS A COMEDIAN LOL.
KILL BILL 1 AND 2. IT SUCKS, DONT DENY IT: So boring. I'm sick of this ugly lady fighting s**t. The first one was bad, but the second was just plain terrible. "OMG IM GOING TO USE 1 INCH PUNCH OF 5 STAR JUSTICE ON YOU, HUSBAND. (lol u r so old)" Little kid: "Uh, I guess I've been living with my dad my whole life, then you come and kill his a**...I guess I'll come with you, strange lady with a damaged brain." Did I ruin the ending for you? Sorry.
Pulp Fiction: Vincent was cool, though, because he was fat and stuff. But then he got uh, by those, uh, and...uh. Man, gimps...ew. Too much drugs, too much afros, too much burgers. It's not terrible like Kill Bill, but it's not as great as everyone says, either.
<center> I can't think of anymore. ON TO THE GOOD ONES. </center>
GOOD MOVIES:
The Grey Zone: Pretty serious movie, seeing as it's based on a true story during the Holocaust. The main character is this guy that loads bodies into the crematories, and like...yeah. But he's got a striking resemblence to the guy who had the CALL-ATT job before carrot top and I wouldn't be suprised if it's him. Anyways, long story short: These prisoners blow up one crematory, and then they're executed. I was on the brink of tears when it was over.
Dawn of the Dead: I can't explain the storyline, but there's zombies. And boobies at the middle and end. Mass chaos + boobies + things that pop out = hohyes. And to top that all off, there's a Jay Leno zombie. Come on, Jay Leno as a zombie? That automatically makes the movie awesome.
Blade I and II: It's about this vampire guy that uses this junk and he's like, "HEY COOL DIE VAMPIRES IM A VAMPIRE BUT YOU SUCK I WIN!"
FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH, A NEW BEGINNING: Worst storyline ever, it even makes Dawn of Dead's lack of one look good. It's about this kid, he's crazy and s**t, and he goes to this shack where crazy people live. And these crazy people have nice boobies, and they show them...every like 3 minutes. So more boobies, but I bet the movie is so old that the girls are old enough to be my mom. Ewwww.
<center> Feel free to comment and rant about how I'm wrong. But you know, deep inside, that I'm right. So yes.
 Geck · Sat Nov 20, 2004 @ 10:23pm · 3 Comments |
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