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well, this is my 111 entry. Rather odd. Anyways, I just have been thinking soo much lately about everything. How much I've grown since I moved, how much I've learned. It's odd. Less than 2years ago, I was completely insecure, wouldn't get near guys, rarely hugged them or anything, and now I can barely go through a day without someone coming up and hugging me or vice versa. People always think of me as this strong and secure person, and yet I don't think any of them realize that I am still a kid. My mom either calls me really mature, or treats me like a kid. And well. I'm not sure how I want to be treated. Truly. I've dealt with so much, but being a kid is fun, and something I enjoy. whatever...
So This friday, I'm going to see Bye Bye Birdie at Aptos with my Grandma, which is.... I dunno^_^ Annoying show, but I love my grandma, so yeah.. I feel a little sick of class, and I'm getting really day dreamy lately. You know what? I sometimes wish I could just dream all the time. Everyone always says and does the right things in my dream, even me. And then I wake up, and someone says something stupid, or I do something dumb, and I can't help but feel dissapointed. It'd be nice if every once in a while, I could meet a guy who would actually just take my flirting as an appropriate sign, just walk up, push meup against a wall, and truly kiss me. I've never really had anyone do that, and when someone tried, it was an awful situation where I couldn't do anything because I was dating someone else. *sighs*
-Sometimes I wonder what good dreams are if even when they start to come true, it turns out wrong. Maybe just to keep hope, but when your dreams never come true, and the happily ever after is nowhere in sight, the hope drifts, and dreams become a refuge, an escape. And even then the escape starts to have fangs. Danger becomes the alluring change from despair, and in a flash, the dreams become nightmares, and nightmares become reality. Suddenly everything you dreamed about is turned against you, and you can't stop it. It chokes you, gripping at your throat as you were it's last breath. And then you wake up, and the day starts again.- I liked this, I think I might use it in english at some point.
this is kinda my cosplay for Fanime! but with suspenders basically.
 Bewitchedh · Thu Mar 23, 2006 @ 01:04am · 5 Comments |
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