hmm... well i havent really thought to post in awile... my grandfather died the first morning of the waneing moon (2/25) it was a Friday and i still went to school... yea... that was a bad idea. it was bad enough i had to deal with the stress of my only trusted friend in this new school slapping me ... well not my butt but the other side...><. yea ok i had more friends at the school but Heather was 19 and she finally graduated a few months ago....and Kit had to move because her mother was trying to run away from her stepdad (long story i dont have the rights to tell). so i was left with dillon who has trusted allot of secrets about himself in me so i did the same for him. at least i thought i could trust him but now that he's done that... im not sure if i can bring myself to trust a man agian. which makes me want to cry because i want so desperately to trust Jesse (who lives a half hour away and goes to a differant school which is good for dillon because im sure he wouldn't be pleased to hear what he did). Anyway, so i place myself in the far corner of the class because i know i dont want to be bothered by anyone (especally dillon who sits next to me) and i sit. i sorta blank out accually until this boy, creig, comes up behind me and pokes my head. i stood up and klenched my fists. the whole class was staring at this point and him and his friend were just laughing (i live in the "bible belt" and everyone at this school thinks im a witch) "care to try it again!" i roared at him and he stayed looking away "dont look her in the eyes" he said continuing to laugh. oh crud im going into 'typing a book mode' well yea my eyes filled with tears. i never felt so horrible or so passionate to beat someone to the ground and accually not care what consequences awaited me. i sat down and almost started crying but i tried even harder to keep it in. i dunno if that was bad or not... for the rest of the day i just sat in Mrs Palmers room. im starting to think im acidentally trying to replace her as mother but i consider her a good friend so maybe not. otherwise it was a creepy time up until now and considering grandfather was the first to die in my family to that generation... i can only hope for things to get worse
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