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Here's my Quotes List, over 100 to date and counting!
These aren't in order of favorite; but rather, the order in which I came across them. Some numbers have no quote because I got rid of them, and sometimes is skips a number entirely, for the same reason.
Feel free to post your own in comments or PMs, and they may get added to my hardcopy in MS word.
1) Emotions cry out; so should you--Lizzie Hustead
2) I know inatimate objects with more originality than that.
3) Reality is what you make of it. So, you're a flying penquin and I'm a smurf.
4) "A life sounds good. Where can I download one?"
5) It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you.
6) Oh s**t.
7) When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then, cackle with glee as everyone wonders how the hell you pulled THAT one off.
cool When life gives you lemons, throw them at people.
9) If I can't change my future, I might as well destroy everyone elses.
10) Oops! Did my sarcasm hurt your feelings? Get over it.
11) Go take a long walk off the shortest bridge you can find.
12) No one ever won a war by dying for their country. They won by making the other son-of-a-b***h die for his.
13) One day, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.
14) I solomnly swear that I will kill you if you don't shut up.
15) 90% of Gaians have a bullshit statistic in their signature. Put this in your signature if you're the 10% that adores irony.
16) Sometimes I wish I was a little girl again--because bruised knees heal faster than broken hearts.
17) Oh, the sarcasm is killing me.
18 ) I R smurt.
19) Smile. It scares people.
20) Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most
21) I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.
22) Dogs have owners, cats have staff.
23) Eagles may soar, but weasels are never sucked into jet engines.
24) Well, this sucks.
25) "Gods don't play dice with the universe.... it's more like a drunken game of blindfolded darts."
26) Robots will never take over the world, because they will run on Microsoft. Every time one of them attempts to execute 'takeover.exe', they will have a full system failure and need to be rebooted several times. Similarly, jet-packs will be snooty and European, and the computers that plug into the back of your head will run nothing but porno ads.
27) "The road of Life has s**t on it. What you need to do is learn to wipe it off your shoes and keep walking."
"I'm thinking you need to become smart enough to look where you step."
"Yeah, some people do, but some heaps are of crap are just too big to avoid, no matter what size strides you take."
28 ) If you have nothing nice to say, there is clearly a problem with your current situation.
29) If any deity really did care about how and who humans worshiped, then there would only be one religion.
30) You're thirty seconds away from having the back of your skull splattered across the wall behind you - I'm giving you twenty to give me a good reason why I shouldn't.
31) Keep talking. I love hearing idiots trying to sound like they know everything.
32) I do not understand why everything in this script must inevitably explode.
33) Goodnight loves, I'm off to the realm of sugared dreams and artificial ideals of optimistic happiness.
...No, I am not going to kill myself.
34) When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand oranges. Show life who's boss.
35) Alright, you're freshmen, so we will explain this to you. We are seniors- therefore we out rank you. You are not allowed to be rude or to contradict us- you aren't allowed to breath our air, you unicellular subclasses of barely evolved plankton-like sludge.
36) Sorry, I wasn't paying attention when you told me to pay attention.
37) You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!
3 cool I don't agree with everything I say.
39) She loved him unconditionally and he found that fascinating.
40) Will someone please get that cow off of my counter? I need to make lunch.
41) When someone hurts you, don't worry. You've just been given permission to break out the explosives
42) I haven't done that, I don't want to and I won't. What's more, you can't make me!
43)
44) I hate you and I wish you eternal doom and despair.
45) Whoever said nothing is impossible clearly never tried slamming a revolving door.
46) She has moments where she appears stable, but then again, so does nitro-glycerin.
47) (to the mirror) You are, without a doubt, the most annoying person I've ever met.
4 cool Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. AHH! Beholders! RUN!
49) "******** you."
"Anytime."
50) "Don't worry, I'll make it through this or I'll die trying."
"Oh, okay then. Wait, what?"
51) It's never enough that you can just annoy me... You have to apparently annoy all sense out of me, which eventually leads to you getting your a** kicked because all sense is lost. That's not very sensible, is it?
52) Does everybody hate me so much to do the complete opposite of everything I tell them?!
53) Am I the only one here with an I.Q. that doesn't go into negative numbers?
54) "Just when you think you've finally hit the bottom,
someone tosses you a shovel."
55) "Yes curiousity did kill the cat, but you have to remember that the cat has nine lives."
56) Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.
57) Time wounds all heals.
5 cool I walk slowly, but I never walk backwards.
59) Quiet! I'm trying to listen to the voices in my head.
60) Why is Death in the kitchen, and why is she painting your face?
61) Isn't it amazing how often the painfully obvious needs to be stated?
62) Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you critisize them, you are a mile away from them, and you have their shoes.
63) Guy 1: My little brother is such an immature brat!
Guy 2: With you as an example, I'm not surprised.
64) Life's a journey; I don't wanna go through it following a roadmap.
65) Relax. Failing isn't something I do.
66) In the future, let's restrict our conversations to "hello" and "goodbye".
67) Reality continues to ruin my life.
6 cool You fear too much.
69) I'm the moron? You're the one writing KICK ME on the back of your own shirt!
70) I have been searching the farthest corners of my extensive vocabulary trying to find a way to say this without offending you. I have determined that it is impossible so I'll just say it outright. I am smarter than you. I am smarter than 95% of this school, including the falculty. I have had teachers admit that I am smarter than them. So when I treat you like an idiot, it is nothing personal. It is just the way I have come to react to people.
71) I was cultivated and grown under your care like a rose, but every rose has its thorns.
And every thorn can be removed, if you have the right tool.
72) Respect what scares you, because its strong and powerful enough to scare you.
73) Listen, what I lack in sanity, I more than make up for in insanity.
74) Don't plan for tomorrow. Plan for subsequent todays.
75) Do stop killing my language. I need that, y'know.
76) When all else fails, confuse your enemies with teenager-logic.
77) I reject your reality and substitute my own!
78 ) Life's goal isn't to arrive at the grave in a perfect well preserved body, but to skid in sideways, totally worn out shouting 'Holy s**t what a ride!'
79) I remember when getting high meant swinging at the playground, the worst thing you could get from a boy were cooties, race issues were who could run the fastest, and the only thing you smoked were the tires on your bike. The thing I remember the most is...wanting to grow up.
80) I refuse to enter a battle of wits with an unarmed man.
81) A good essay is like a woman's skirt- long enough to cover the good stuff, but short enough to keep things interesting.
82) I felt as if my stomach had flipped itself over and was now flailing mindlessly against my ribcage.
83) Why be beautiful when you can have a personality?
84) If you would like to keep your head on your body, I think it would be wise to keep your mouth shut.
85) Oh don't look at me like that. It's not mine. I have no idea whose it is. All I know is that it's human.
86) Poetry is to writing as dancing is to walking; both can get you where you want to go, but one is a hell of a lot more interesting than the other.
87) I don't care what you say about me at this point. Just don't drop that grenade, whatever you do.
8 cool This computer has temporarily gained artificial intelligence. Please try again later.
89) I'm sorry, you must have mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.
90) We're all going to hell for this and I'm leading the way.
91) If ignorance is bliss, then why aren't there more happy people on earth?
92) Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.
93) Let me see, after evaluating the situation....we're ********.
94) I love myself platonically, but it's not mutual.
95) Let me explain this to you in terms that I can understand.
96) Tears - the hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.
97) Being good's no fun but being bad's unoriginal, so what're you going to do?
9 cool J, you and I man... we're like, brothers! We go together like... like oil and water!
99) Smoking? Yeah, it makes you cool. I've heard it gets pretty cold six feet under.
100) David’s eyes showed no fear, no guilt, no pain; they revealed nothing, and in turn, they saw nothing.
101) If you were told that if you loved the person, you'd have sex with them, and you don't want to? Walk away.
- Miho Seriphim
102) It appears you have won, despite your best efforts.
103) "You're not exactly sane, are you?"
"I thought we'd established that."
"We did. She's just trying to stall you so you won't kill her."
"Oh. Right."
104) You're the first person who I've actually had a desire to kill. Whether you consider yourself honored or damned is completely your choice.
105) Even if you die a hero, you are still dead. Sometimes, it is better to stand down and live to see another day.
106) "My girlfriend thinks we're gay," he said flatly. "Together."
107) To the world, you are only one person, but to one person you may be the entire universe.
10 cool "I like to look on the negative side of things."
"That must makes life depressing...."
"No, it makes it hilarious."
109) Who let you out of your padded cell?
110) I failed a personality test once.
112) I label people who don't want to be labeled as the unlabeled biggrin
113) I've only seen "Caucasian" on the tests that I've taken.
What I wanna know is where Caucasia is.
114) I almost burnt my whole house down making Easy Mac.
I don't think I can fail any worse.
115) A closed mouth gathers no foot.
116) "Run. Run until you can't breathe and your legs stop moving. When you run out of ground, when you have no more strength to move, when you know everything is over...when that happens, I'll be there."
117) "No... no, I won't stop! You can't make me!"
11 cool "Everyday, I will be here, fighting by your side. I am your protector, and no matter the day, no matter the hour, no matter the moment, I am yours, and you are mine."
119) Oh look, a wall; don't see many of those these days.
120) "Heh, seems like Curiosity's blade isn't just reserved for cats."
121) Apparently, wars are started because people are greedy and Bush is president.
122) “Woe for people who really just want to be together in a world that is anything but ******** simple."
 Lt Oblivious · Tue Jul 17, 2007 @ 04:03am · 0 Comments |
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