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[Voice]
Ever since I was young, I've been hiding myself.
My face, Behind a happy mask Of innocence and naïvety, I would portray careless freedom, As if I were completely ignorant Of the chaos and disarray Constantly surrounding me.
I have always acted; Pretending I didn't care How anything would affect me, Because I desperately wanted to be Just like the other children; The ones who really didn't care, Or maybe they didn't understand.
But I did. I knew. I cared.
And I still do. Back then I was a coward, Scared of speaking up, Of voicing my opinion; Of just being me.
All I wanted was acceptance; Even the simplest things sufficed. What I needed most, T'was also what I lacked: A voice. Courage. Self-confidence.
I learned quickly, however, That without trusting myself, It was impossible to trust others. Many of the friends I had found, I had quickly lost as well.
As I write this, I feel that the few friendships that have remained Can survive even from different places And time spent far apart.
Since all that, I have changed. I think we all have, But we're still living, Still caring for each other.
These friends, Incredible and unique people, They've given me the courage to follow my dreams, To stop the acting, be myself. And they have accepted me for just that: Me.
I may be strange, or weird, Even to the point of eccentricity. My erratic nature is what now seems to define me, But I'm still human, like you, Even though I tend to spend more time thinking... About things long since passed; Things that have yet to happen.
But I'm living for my self, And those who helped me to find it. I'm going to follow my dreams, No matter what obstacles threaten me, I won't go astray. I'll stick to my path. I won't be so easily controlled.
I've found myself, my courage, Defined my dreams, my goals. I have discovered the most important thing in my life. My purpose:
My voice.
-FireChild21894 see her profile here: http://www.gaiaonline.com/p/2491461
kahaki kiari · Sun Feb 01, 2009 @ 12:10am · 1 Comments |
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