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well nothing really to talk about lately. i am still in the darkness yet the one who i love keeps me from being completely devoured by it. his happiness is my happiness, though it is hard to keep my jealousy at bay i manage. i want him to look at me and only me. i know that that would be an unfair thing to tell him. he asks me what is wrong i would say nothing and act happy, but somehow he always gets me tell him what is wrong. i know he loves me but i believe that i am the source of his pain as well. i do not want to be a burden to him. my love forgive me heart