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It's so strange how things can be so different now.
Even now, i don't know how to process my feelings.
I dreamed about him one night.
It felt so real. I could see him.
HE was so close i could feel him.
Taste him in the air.
Then i opened my eyes,
and he wasn't there.
I fell like everythign i once knew
is crashing down on me crushing me
into oblivion.
What am i to do?
I can't fight it.
I can't ignore it.
It's tearing me apart killing me from the inside.
How do you fight something you love?
IF all you can give to them is your life, your love?
How could you not give it?
Pain is inevitable.
Suffering is optional.
I'm choosing to suffer.
And for what?
For someone I'll never have.
For someone who will never love me?
This is ridiculous.
It's 2am and I'm wallowing in self pity.
What a slump i have let myself fall into.

Le bonheur est fugitif.
L'amour disparaît.
La vie deviant inutile.

-Jeanea is hopelessly retarded.
Ps. Please, save me from myself.