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I still miss my best friend alexis , it still hurts and i can emotionally , mentally , and physically still feel the pain , it never gose away and it wont leave me alone my heart literally is hurting like crazy , i feel like my heart is in a million picses and either its going to take years to put it back or it just may never be healed , i miss her to death , why did she have to go so sudden , i remeber the last thing i said to her was goodbye that friday and remeber how she ran off cause she was going to miss her bus home but i guess she really did go home , i just wish i would have got just a little more time with her , she was like my sister are families were close and everything she was part of me and when she left she took part of me with her , ever since that night that i found out she died i have never felt complete i feel like something of me is missing and i need it back , her visiting in my dreams is not enough i need her here with me in person , i miss my friend and i still cant believe shes dead its just not real for me i keep thinkin that my phone is going to ring and i see her caller id or that she will walk down to my house so i can borrow her twilight books but the days go on and it never happends , sometimes i cant breath and i just shut down it put me in depression for a while and my life has just been a mess with out her , she was the glue that kept me from falling apart and the tape to tape up any damages on me , its not easy loosing a close person that i loved very very much and now shes gone and theres nothing i can do , DAMN IT ! WHY SHE HAD TO ******** LEAVE! I MISS HER! I WANT HER BACK! crying ITS NOT FAIR DAMNIT! crying