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I feel accomplished. I have yet to break down crying today, though at times i feel so close to tears that they threaten to cloud my vision. I've been talking with the one person who could ever have me feel like this. I didn't think we would get this close again and that I would have to worry about it. But now it feels like before. We are so close and yet so not at the same time. I want to be able to just accept them back into my life like i had before but i don't know if they want it to be like that again. and I don't know if we should be like that any more. but just talking with them and the way we talk and goof around makes me wonder if they do want to get back with me. I'm probably reading to much into, and i don't want to ask anything about it because i'm afraid that then they'll stop. and I don't what that. I don't know for sure what I want. But to talk with them like this feels good, it makes me smile and i miss it so badly that i want to cling to every moment and not let a single one of them pass me by. and when it feels like they are slipping away I just want to break down and sob because it feels so miserable. i miss it all so terribly, i miss them.