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Hi there! Violet or A Vampires Butterfly here! Full credit for inspiration on this one goes to the wonderful, the talented, the awesome, and patient Anonymous! Heh...I didn't know I was gonna do it until I did it...This was probably the fastest I have ever written smut...I'm not even joking...It usually takes me months upon months to write smut for a real story...So I hope you like it, Anonymous! With much love, A Vampires Butterfly ^.^

Title: Light's Poor Unfortunate Shirts
Anime: Death Note
Couple: Light and L
Warnings: Total and complete smut! I'm talk strawberry lube and chains here, people. Turn away and hide if this scares you!
Rating: 18+
Summary: "Torn to tatters, riped down the back, buttons everywhere! Light and his shirts have had it!"

“Not again! Ryuzaki!” Light growled out the name as he looked next to him to see his shirt once again in tatters. Every single time. Every single damn time! L and he had been…Well…Sexually active together for a month now. It had started with a stupid competition and ended up with him having very bruised lips and the need for cushioned seat…But that was another story.

He picked up the pieces of his very nice silk shirt, the buttons hanging pitifully, still in the holes. He scowled at it. He loved this shirt! Why couldn’t L be more careful? For a month now, he had been losing shirt after shirt thanks to those stupid handcuffs.

Even while having sex with him, L didn’t trust him to be free! It was ridiculous! He had tried pointing out just how stupid it was to L, countless times, but the stupid detective had just responded with the same thing every time.

“Until Kira is caught, the cuffs stay on. Now go to sleep, Yagami-kun.”

Light was ready to strangle him. He looked over at the man in the bed beside him, for once sleeping. Yes, he looked much too sexy for someone just simply sleeping…But Light was too pissed to fully be affected by pale skin and dark hair or the much too adorable small snores that came from the man. Stupid L!

Light turned his attention back to his shirt. This had be the eighth one to be killed at L’s hands. Sometimes Light wondered if the other man just wanted him to run around with a bare chest for the rest of his life.

He scowled as he remembered how much this shirt had cost…Why had he been stupid enough to wear this one with L around? Oh yes, because he never knew w hen L would decide to pounce! One minute he could be typing innocently on the computer and the next he was being bent over the desk, shirt being torn down the back and pants around his ankles, just because he had supposedly ‘yawned much too cutely’.

Sure…At the time of the activities he really wasn’t too aware of his shirt condition, nor did he usually care. But when it was over and he was stuck trying to pull back on whatever shreds were left of his usually expensive shirt before someone came in to check on them…Well that was when he got mad.

But did L care? No. The b*****d even went so far as to make fun of him! Saying that he shouldn’t be so ‘girly’ and be so obsessed with his shirts. Che…As if Ryuzaki knew how a girl acted! Or how normal people were supposed to care about what they wore! Not everyone could pull off baggy jeans and white sweaters! And just because he preferred to dress nicely didn’t mean he was girly, damn it!

Light simmered, hands fisted in ruined silk fabric. What? Was he supposed to go around dressing in cheap white sweaters? Or…He shuddered at the thought…Some kind of cotton blend? He would get a rash! He rubbed the goosebumps away from his bare arms, convincing his skin that it would be taken care of, no matter what that b*****d did to his poor shirts.

But, at the rate L was going, he would be out of shirts…And he truly wasn’t made out of money, unlike some high paid detective bastards…He wouldn’t dare ask his father for money, that would lead to questions on just why he needed more shirts when he had just bought some…Misa was, of course, out of the question, though the model/actress had money to give. That would also lead to questions on why her so called boyfriend needed more shirts when they hadn’t touched each other in…Ever. Also, she would probably insist on buying shirts for him herself…He shuddered at the thought before turning to glare at L again.

This was all his fault. Him and his stupid handcuffs. Why couldn’t he just use the key for once? It wasn’t as Light would suddenly decide to run away! Though the thought sounded like a very good idea at the moment. That would show the b*****d for messing up his defenseless shirts. Not even Kira deserved what his shirts were put through!

He was pulled out of his thoughts as he saw L shift in his sleep, a sure sign that he was waking up. Good. He was ready to give that idiot a piece of his freaking mind! Nobody messed with his shirts and got away with it! Nothing was going to distract him!

Then L sat up sleepily, rubbing his eye, his hair perfectly messy in a way that shouldn’t be legal, and only a sheet covering parts only Light got to see. He saw Light still awake, sitting on the edge of the bed, and blinked in that owlish way he did when he just woke up before moving towards him and looping a arm around his shoulders, breath tickling his neck, and chest pressed firmly against his back. Dark eyes glanced down at the torn material being clenched in Light’s fists before going back to Light.

“Something wrong, Yagami-kun?” he dared to ask in that oh so innocent tone! Light tried to think of just why he was so mad at the b*****d, but he could smell the always present sugar coated strawberry smell that L had gotten him addicted to. The damn detective knew he couldn’t think nearly as well when he was so close…His brain power basically died until it was at Misa level and he be damned if Ryuzaki didn’t use it to his advantage.

“My shirt, Ryuzaki…It’s ruined.” He finally managed to get out. His grip on the shirt slipped a bit as L moved impossibly closer, as if he really wanted a better look at the torn shirt.

“Really? Ah…I guess it is…Well you could always borrow a shirt of mine, Yagami-kun. I wouldn’t mind.” He said so simply, as if that solved all of Light’s problems. Light grit his teeth as he could practically hear the smirk in L’s tone. He couldn’t ever, no not ever, see himself wearing anything even close to L’s type of clothing.

“I don’t think that would work, Ryuzaki…It wouldn’t be good to be wearing the same thing as you…People might suspect something.” He said, reasonably, trying to ignore the shiver that wanted to crawl down his spine, feeling just how close L’s mouth was to his neck. The b*****d could probably feel his pulse…He glowered as L chuckled behind him.

“Well we could always tell them that the clothes you currently enjoy to wear make me suspect you are Kira. I don’t think they would argue…” L suggested, obviously amused by his own words. Light frowned at L’s obvious low opinion of the others’ intelligence…Though he didn’t doubt the plan would work. Damn genius idiot.

“Or you could just decide to not ruin my shirts and undo my cuffs for our activities.” He replied, turning his head to the face the pale detective. Dark eyes met his, previous humor gone.

“As I have told you, Yagami-kun, until Kira is caught-“ L was cut off as Light finished for him.

“The cuffs stay on, I get it.” Light said, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. If he heard those words one more time, he would not be held responsible for his actions.

“I’m glad I’ve gotten my point across so clearly, Yagami-kun. So you understand why your shirts must be ruined then?” L asked, looking tauntingly questioning.

Light turned to face him again, trying to wiggle out of the other’s touch. Not that he could go far, but still…His brain was being turned into mush and he had to win this fight! L refused to let him go and instead pulled him closer, so that now their chests were touching, Light almost in the other’s lap. Light was getting close to punching him…

“I like my shirts, Ryuzaki. I do not want them ruined! Just take the damn cuffs off!” Light continued to argue, still struggling to get out L’s grasp. He could feel the chain starting to tighten, biting into his wrist as L gave a sharp tug, the genius even going so far as to tut at him!

“Now, Yagami-kun, that seems a little selfish, doesn’t it? Months of careful observation would be a complete waste if I released you for even a second. How can you ask me to ruin our investigation like that? All for some silly shirts? Really, Yagami-kun, I’m disappointed in you.” L lectured, even as Light felt an all too familiar arousal pushing against him. It seemed that L had succeed in pulling him into the other’s lap…The chain had gotten wrapped part way around his chest, insuring that he couldn’t go far at all now.

“Besides, Yagami-kun…”L leaned in closer and Light tired to move back with little success, “You don’t have a shirt on now, do you? What does it matter?”

Light tried to protest, telling him just what mattered and why, but was cut off before he got started as L’s lips sealed over his. And that was about the time Light lost the battle. His shirts be damned.

He leaned into L’s kiss, trying to get dominance, fighting for it, like he always did. One day he would win…Today wasn’t that day. L pushed him back, so his head hung over the side of the bed, torn shirt on the ground beneath him.

L followed his mouth, continuing to ravage him. Hands roamed over his thankfully already naked skin. Light arched into the touch and felt the thin chain dig into his skin, pinching him, completely different from the gentle, teasing touches that L gave him. He bit at L’s lips, to give the other man pain as well, but the detective just pulled away, doing that damned tutting again, before letting his mouth follow his much too talented hands.

“Ryuzakiiiii…Take off..nh…The cuffs!” he demanded, already feeling the chains becoming imprinted in his skin. L didn’t verbally respond, instead choosing to bite at the tender skin of his inner thigh and pull hard on the chain attached to his wrist.

Light’s upper half was tugged off the bed; his bottom half pinned down by L. Light held back a moan, before quickly falling back to soft fabric of the bed. Damned b*****d…Light watched as that dark head raised, even darker eyes meeting his.

“What was that, Yagami-kun? I don’t think I heard you correctly.” L said, tone daring him to ask for the cuffs removal again. Light glared and took the bait.

“Take…Off…The cuffs…Ryuzaki…” he grounded out, hands fisted in the sheets beneath him, thankfully not pinned to his sides…This time…

L’s eyes darkened in a look that Light recognized and braced himself for what was to come. The chain was taken in a pale cuffed hand and pulled so harshly that Light was fully pulled off the bed, chains constricting and biting into his skin.

L held him there and sat up himself, meeting Light half way. Pink lips pressed hard against his own, teeth biting at his bottom lip almost to the point of bleeding until he finally, unwillingly, surrendered, showing a small act of submission. L took advantage of it and Light felt the normally sugar coated tongue explore his mouth for what had to be the millionth time.

Light used the rare freedom of his hands to try to push L backwards, to gain some kind of upper hand and loosen the grip L still on the chain. L broke their lip contact, looking amused at his attempts.

“Impatient, Yagami-kun?” he asked, voice low and having that husky edge that made Light want to both kiss him again and punch him in the nose. L pushed him back again, both his head and his shoulders hanging off the edge of the bed now, releasing the tension on the chain. A pale hand grabbed for the previously discarded tube of lube, strawberry scented and, of course, edible…

Light wondered sometimes if L ate it, even when they weren’t having sex…They seemed to go through it faster then they should…The thought was thrown out the window as he saw L open the bottle, letting the light pink lube smear over long fingers.

A pink tongue darted out to lick away the excess, making Light groan and close his eyes, unable to take the image. Why couldn’t the b*****d hurry? He could feel himself aching at this point; wanting nothing more then demand L get on with it, but knowing that would just make the detective slow the process further.

His eyes shot open as he felt a slick finger circle his entrance, before entering him quickly. He tried to sit up without much success and tilted his head up to glare at the innocent looking L.

“Relax, Yagami-kun…Breathe…” L said simply to his glare, already working in another finger. Light probably didn’t need much preparation, since they had done this exact same thing not to long ago, but L knew that if the younger boy hurt more then necessary, he would never hear the end of it.

Light only glared more at the supposed words of reassurance, following them as he did. Stupid L…He would like to see the detective do this all the damn time…He knew the first thing he was doing as soon as the cuffs came off, he was going to show the b*****d just how ‘fun’ handcuffs could be. Just another reason to catch the real Kira.

Light squirmed a little as the third finger entered him, feeling himself hanging even further off the bed. He opened his mouth to suggest that L at least let him move up on the bed more, but instead a loud cry came out as L began to rub against that spot that was possibly the only thing that convinced him not to want to either punch or kill L for his actions.

Light felt the fingers pull out quickly after the older man received his pleasured cry…He held back a whimper as the finger retreated and braced himself for what was coming next, his mind still swimming in pleasure.

But it didn’t come. Instead he felt a coldness seep onto his weeping member and then an almost unbearable heat. He opened his eyes, wondering when they had closed in the first place, and saw L licking and sucking in his now very strawberry flavored hard on. The lube was probably the only reason L had decided oral would be a good way to distract him, but he could truly have cared less at this point.

“Ryu..zaki…Ah…” he moaned out, sadly unable to suppress them as L began to lick all the way to the bottom, trying to get any remaining strawberry flavoring. He was so close…Just few more stupid licks…Just a little more touch…But the stupid genius deceived him again, pulling away from his member, as if knowing what he wanted.

Instead he positioned himself, hand that didn’t have the cuff on its wrist reaching up to run almost ticklish touches over both his skin and the chains before entering him quickly. He arched up, feeling the chains digging in and not caring. A little cry spilled from his bruised lips as L began to thrust into him, increasing as he continued.

He could hear L panting above him, sometimes hearing his first name for once uttered, but drowned out. He could feel himself getting pushed, thrust by thrust, further off the bed and tried to warn Ryuzaki, but was once again distracted as the older man wrapped his hand around his weeping member.

He moaned as L hit that star seeing spot inside of him and moved to push back on L, to get more sensation for himself. L leaned down and kissed him opened mouth, tongues meeting each other, but not bothering with a fight as they both tried to reach their climax.

L pulled back suddenly and bit into Light shoulder, just where his shirt would cover it. Light’s eyes closed at the pain and he arched again, feeling the chains added another sensation of pain. He felt himself explode wonderfully and didn’t feel like punching L at all…Even when he himself was filled.

Then he heard L let out a strange yelp before feeling his head collide painfully with the ground. He groaned, not wanting to move, much less fall off the bed…Now his head and a** ached…Stupid L…

He began to unwind himself from the chain and punched L hard in the arm before climbing back onto the bed, dragging the so called genius behind him. He once again saw his torn to tatters shirt and just sighed, climbing under the covers, feeling too tired to completely pissed at the detective…Maybe in an hour or two.

He felt L get in next to him, and do that usually annoying thing he did with his hair, always running long fingers through it, like he would find something one day…Light didn’t mind it too much at the moment and even allowed himself to wrap an arm around a strangely thin waist. His mind began to go into sleep mode, limps feeling tired and satisfied…He closed his eyes and sighed, before one last thought entered his mind.

“Tomorrow you’re coming with me to buy shirts, Ryuzaki…” he mumbled, just loud for the detective to hear, before drifting to sleep, completely missing the absolute look of terror that formed onto L’s face at the words.

No one messed with Light Yagami’s shirts and got away it.