It's been a long time since I have written one of these and right now I am exhausted. I am missing my parents and family. I regret saying certain things to people and how I have behaved. I long for a future that I can predict and be joyful about. I need for someone to feel the same about the past as I do and connect with me on a similar level as back then. I feel as though things will get easier.
I am swamped with school and inside drama. I have been depressed, crying randomly still and without Gaia, I have been able to keep my school life in order. I need to get my routine in a place where I have free time for Gaia, right now i have none. I want straight A's this semester. I need better grades. I need them for me.
I am going home to Sac this weekend to be with my family. I feel like they need me. I need them. I miss them a lot, terribly really.
I have a lot of things still to talk about in therapy. We have only met 3 times and he is still trying to understand who I am and how I work so we haven't really talked about anything. I think next time I'll tell him what he's done that has bothered me...
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Fragmented Self who wanders through life like a dreamer and wades through the river of dreams as though it were the only truth left in this world
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